Freedom: November 2014

busy like thats no tomorrow......... i wonder weather is worth the time working but still it was my choice from the start...... i really want to go to a place far away where i cannot be found......

since i don't know when i had started to like being alone like alone. i started to develop the fear of meeting new people. but my work had demand me to meet many different type of people even to some scary women who just cant be patient with you while receiving their cash or products that they purchase. sometimes i wish to scream into their face like real loud but then again who am i? im just some part timer lol. and from this few weeks of working i began to judge people and get frustrated so easily. when i come home after work im quiet i dont say much like what happen during work. don't get me wrong my work is good and ~~kinda fun~~ i learn a lot of things that is beyond my age. one thing good about working is i get to think through a lot of stuffs that happen in my life and here was few of the things......

life is so freaking unfair like sooooo unfair. i join my church camp during one of the three days in ipoh ( my hometown). and one afternoon my mum took me for a walk around ipoh town and showed me her house and school and at the same time i realize homeless people sleeping around the streets and beggars begging for money ~~( they look kinda scary )~~. is real sad like rich people they can use their money to gamble and get drunk and all but here are poor people trying hard just to have at least one meal a day.......

besides, few weeks ago an uncle that i just meet....... died all of a sudden..... in his sleep..... no goodbye..... no word said..... just gone forever....... he was rich. his life was prosperous as a business man but then boom the next thing without any warning he was gone...... FOREVER

and i realize this:

life there are tough time and sometimes is like you can break down. your mind dont seems like working is like you are dead but still breathing. is like you are running out of breath. is like you just want to hide. is like you just want to fall into a deep sleep and never wake up........
but our heart is like the above pic up and down and up again. is the same as life. this only goes to show we are still alive. and life is just like that is the fact of life...........

but if our life is like the above pic where it seems so smooth and easy.......... it goes to show we are dead. come to think of it whose life dont have freaking any problem. if this is true they are not growing in life they are stunted.......... dead........

she told me once "if you see anyone really happy on the outward actually they are the once who are really depressed and sad...."

*im in no way judging anyone in this blog. all of this are just my thoughts. im not emoing just in case u think i am hehe.

till next time byeeeeeee

I have never been to penang as surprise as it sounds so when a trip to penang was planned i beg my parents to let me go. this trip was one of the most unforgetful trip and was the first school trip i went without shyne-ni and juniper ( was a bit down when they told they wont be going) but then i had lots of good time with other friends Chan Kah Mun and Enqi and few others.

Even though there was a bit of trouble here and there, places that we dident get to go but still it was a fun and yolo trip after all hehe. one of the best place is the hostel where we stayed. before the trip i got the news from joseph that the toilet was public and is unisex and i was kinda angry because toilet is like my second "house" i go toilet like countless times in a day haha. but then the hostel was awesome and so freaking cozyyyyy. the toilet turn out pretty good.

1. here is the cozy place where we play cards, chat, laugh, just chill and take selfies.

2. escape theme park (the yolo place)

i hang out most of the time with Chan Kah Mun and i swear her actions and her screams while playing those game is so darn funny. never saw that part of her till then. i always made her play any game before me and i will be watching her if is scary then at least i can escape haha. there were times when she scream till it make me shiver and there were times when her actions basically when she suffered trying to finish playing those games make me laugh till i want to drop. i should had help her but then i just stood there and laugh. anyway thank you kah mun for helping me especially while playing the flying fox and throughout all those tough games. those were indeed nice memories :)